Is [...]]]> In this modern age where there are so many ways to network with other people whether it be through Facebook, Twitter, Myspace, Wordpress, Blogger, Tumblr, YouTube, or even old-fashioned instant messenger as well as so many more, we sometimes find ourselves wondering what the actual “rules” are when it comes to using these resources.

Is is acceptable to befriend somebody you don’t know?
Is it ok to deny a person your friendship on Facebook even if you know them but don’t really want to be friends?
Is it rude to not follow people on Twitter who are following you?

These are just a few of the issues that I am going to try my best to address for you as well as just how to be successful at them in general. Keep in mind that there really aren’t any rules to these sites “written in stone”. It’s all up to personal technique, interpretation and good ole common sense to decide what you should and shouldn’t do when it comes to using them.

In regards to Facebook:

• Be sure you understand your privacy settings. There are so many boxes to check and uncheck regarding what people will see and won’t see. Don’t get caught by surprise at what people are or aren’t seeing.
• Never post or allow others to tag you in anything that could reflect poorly on your character. You never know when an employer, professor, or family friend will see it and the response that could come from it. If somebody posts a picture of you that would rather not be there, politely send them a message to remove it. If they won’t, then at least un-tag yourself.
• If a stranger or somebody who shares a mutual friend with you tries to befriend you and you aren’t comfortable being their friend, it is completely alright to deny them friendship. It is your privacy at stake and you shouldn’t feel pressured into doing something that makes you feel uncomfortable. Alternatively, you could always send them a message asking how they know you and why they are requesting your friendship. It’s a forward method of course and really depends on your personality. On the flipside, don’t be offended if a stranger denies your request. Additionally, if somebody you do know sends you a request that you’d rather not accept, it might be a good idea to only give them access to your “limited profile” or just suck it up and add them- nobody is forcing you to communicate after all. You could still deny them too, but be aware it may be a little awkward the next time you see them.
• Don’t overload your friend’s homepages with status updates. Most people, while they are your friend, could probably care less what you are doing every 30 minutes. Once or twice a day is acceptable, but try not to take it much farther than that. On the flipside, if you have friends updating statuses or posting things so often that it clutters your page, you can hide their activities from showing up on your feed. It is a good alternative to deleting them from your friends.
• Know what should be written on a wall and written in a message. Before posting something on a friend’s wall (or even your own wall for that matter) remember that what you are posting will be viewable by all of your friends and your friend’s friends. If it is something that may be embarrassing, rude, or just inappropriate, maybe consider sending it in a private message – if at all.

Some rules for relationships on Facebook…

In Regards to Twitter:

• Twitter is pretty loose in rules when it comes to following people. It’s not nearly as formal and privacy isn’t as guarded. Follow whoever you want. Be sure to understand that you can protect your “tweets” from public. Simply go to your account settings and hide them from people you don’t approve of.
• If somebody sends you a direct message, replies to one of your “tweets”, or even begins following you, it is a nice gesture to respond to them. Let them know that you noticed them and that their voice matters as well. Don’t feel pressured into following those who are following you though – it is completely up to you who you get updates from!
• You might want to consider how many people you are following. When your list starts to grow larger than 200-250 following, you may want to either refine your list or consider using an application such as Tweetdeck or Tweetie to help keep your incoming and outgoing “tweets” more organized and an overall more efficient experience.
• Make your profile look nice. Be sure to update you bio, location (if you are comfortable with that), avatar picture, and page background/colors. Doing this will make you more appealing and attract followers. It will also show people that you are real and more personable.
• Don’t solely update your status with what you are actually doing. Sure, that’s what the site says to do; but unless your life is just super exciting, most people won’t really care to hear what you are doing 24/7. It is alright to occasionally tell the Twitterverse what your daily activities are going to consist of or something interesting that happened on the bus ride to work, but be sure that the bulk of your “tweets” do not consist of this unless you want to only attract spam bots and joke accounts. Offer helpful advice, ideas, questions and opinions to get the most from your Twitter experience.

You are never to old to get involved on the Twitter fad...

In Regards to Blogs:

• Be yourself and have fun. This is the number one advice I can give in terms of blogging. Blog as much or as little as you want. Don’t blog about things that don’t interest you. Be who you are and you will be guaranteed to churn out better blog posts that attract more readers. That being said, it is a good idea to try to post something once a week or so if your goal is to attract a lot of traffic. If you spread them out too far, you will have a hard time establishing a regular reader base.
• Use pictures and videos in your posts. Humans are very visual people. Posts full of walls of text are usually a turn-off and will send readers surfing for another blog to read. Something graphical to break the monotony of reading is always a nice addition. Also, be sure to give credit where credit is due for any photos or videos you use.
• Be sure to leave the opportunity for your readers to comment your posts. It is also a good idea to engage in the comments as well to show your readers that you also value their opinions and voice.
• Realize that not everybody is going to agree with you and don’t take it personal if you get mean comments. In many posts, especially those involving opinions, there are bound to be people who will disagree with you and will be very vocal in doing so. Simply accept that not everybody will agree with you and continue doing your thing.
• If it is fame you desire, then you must promote your blog! There are so many ways to do this. Advertise it on Twitter with relevant keywords regarding your posts; tell your friends about it; or you may even consider sending a link to famous blogs such as Anderson Cooper or the official NFL blog and hope somebody takes notice.

Popular blogging platforms…

So there you have it folks. Just a few tips to help make your networking endeavors more successful. Hopefully I helped some of you with some questions or concerns you had. If you have any issues I didn’t address, feel free to leave them in a comment and we’ll try to solve them.

To learn more about these networking sites and just networking in general from the pros, be sure to come to NetworkBash at the Hendrix Center on November 4!

We’ll see you there!

Best wishes,
Stephen Roark
(Clemson Architecture student)